Advice to Anonymous

Anonymous said...
Hi there! On a more serious note, my locker neighbor is treting me funny, Fact is all the girls that are her freinds are acting strange to. I used to be really good friends with her, all of them to tell you the truth, but this new school year has brought around a change. I'm now barely reaching the cut off for anything. Sleepovers, birthday parties, anything important!!! They even talk about it in front of me! They aren't mean or anything, but I really feel left out. I've suffered through a whole quarter of this. HELP!!!!!

Well, Anonymous, the first thing to do is ask yourself whether or not you're still a friend of this girl. Sometimes when you feel obligated to be a person's friennd you feel that you should be nicer to that person. If this is the case, analyze your relationship with her. Does she care about your feelings? From what you've told us, she doesn't. Does she care about your opionion? Again, it doesn't sound like it. If you're 100% sure that this girl will NEVER be a good friend for you, talk to her about the situation. It's awkward, I know, but try to be casual about it. It doesn't have to be a flat-out "Why the heck are you being so mean to me, you idiot!?" or anything like that. It doesn't even have to be a "You're making me feel bad. Please stop." It can be a small remark like "What are you doing this weekend?" If what she's talking about interests you, you might be able to keep up a conversation and save your friendship. If she ignores you, tells you to shut up, or says something mean, this friendship of yours is not worth saving. If this happens, you'd be better of with a new friend. Tell a teacher if this girl is making you uncomfortable. Nobody has the right to put you down or make you feel excluded EVER, and this has been going on for a whole quarter? If talking doesn't work out, tell a parent/teacher/other close friend, or even the guidance counselor. Choose good friends...I've learned that the hard way.

~The Advice Columnist.